


Dactylion

by littleberd



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, First Confession, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, confession times, it's pretty decent, just wait, only these are rather unique in a way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-10-02 14:37:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10220429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleberd/pseuds/littleberd
Summary: Let's just say that Lance really doesn't think of this as a confession and it's too funny a pun not to use. Pidge and Hunk will hold this over his head for the rest of his life. Adorkable Keith and Lance.When you confess that you like-like them to a soulmate their name will appear over a part of the confessor's body that they specifically mentioned in their confession.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment, it keeps me going lol.

After a hard day of battle simulations Lance went to go take a shower to scrub the stick and stink of sweat off. Only when he got into the shower and was finished rinsing out the shampoo did he find out somebody had gotten into his conditioner again.

Muttering a curse, Lance turns the water off with more force than necessary. He wraps his robe around himself, pulls on his slippers and stomps out of the bathroom, still muttering curses.

When he makes it to the lounge his eyes are immediately drawn to the mullet in the room, seeing a shine to his hair that he _knows_ only his conditioner can give. Eye twitching just a bit Lance confronts his conditioner thief. 

"Well, your hair looks better than it _did_ after you used up more than half of _my_ conditioner. But nothing will help the fact that it's still a sad grumpy mullet." Lance prods, poking him in the back of the head with said half empty bottle of hair product.

Keith swats the container away, "I didn't touch your stupid conditioner Lance."

"Oh really? What? Now that you found out your part Galra your hair is suddenly glossy? Have you started giving yourself a tongue bath to try and reconnect with your unknown kitty-cat roots or something?" Lance pokes Keith's forehead with the container.

"What is with your obsession with my hair Lance? Want some part-Galra tips on hair maintenance now?" Keith bites back, trying to grab the container but Lance reels it back, holding it to his chest like he's protecting a small child from Keith's wrath.

"No, I don't even want to look at that mullet in case bad hairstyles are contagious, all _I_ want is for you to fess up to taking my hair conditioner and to STOP using it, or at least use a sane amount! I _just_ got this bottle like not even a week ago! There's no way in Quiznak that I should only have this much left." Lance growls.

"For the last time, I didn't touch your damn hair conditioner!" Keith grabs the bottle before Lance can poke him with it again and tosses it into the combustion trash can and watched it burst into flames. Lance stands there in shock, that was his last bottle of alien hair conditioner that didn't turn his hair green or turn into an Afro. "I still haven't... That was my last..." Lance is shaking in unspoken rage, glaring at Keith's back as he smugly saunters away, "I want to..." Lance almost makes a wringing-neck motion with his hands but settles for flipping him off with a flourish rather than start another fight.

Keith simply turning around and seeing Lance giving him the bird would've been a HELLOVA lot better than what does happen next.

The very tip of his middle finger begins to tingle, giving off a soft red, and Lance stares wide eyed as a certain lying-mullet head's name is written in small red print right below his fingernail. 

" **QUIZNAK**!"

And it is in this moment that the silent unknown audience around Lance bursts out laughing. He hadn't even seen Pidge or Hunk sitting on the couch.

"DACTYLION!! HAHAHAAAAAAAAAH!!!! LANCE!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAAH!!!KEITH!!KEITH!!! COME BACK KEI-" Lance had vaulted over the edge of the couch and smothered Hunk mid-treachery. 

But Keith had heard him and walks back into the lounge, "What's going on Hunk?"

As he's casually lounging on Hunk's back with a hand firmly blocking Hunk's pie-hole, Lance tries to assure "Nothing nothi-" 

"Lance has a D-"Lance swaps from Hunk to Pidge, an "ouch" rings out as Pidge bites his hand and she manages to muffle out, "D-c-" before escaping Lance's silencing hand, "lion!"

"Di...dick ... lion?" Keith looks at the bathrobe wearing paladin of the group, "Umm I'm going to walk out of the room now-" Keith scrunches his eyebrows, and turns to go back the way he came.

"Keith!!! He has a D-*muffle*" Lance jumps back to Hunk but he manages to squirm out of Lance's hold, "for you!"

Keith stops and looks really confused, Lance is ready to pounce on whichever of the two paladins decides to try and squeal first. Hunk sees this and takes one for the team, "Say it Pidge!"

Lance now has a pile of Hunk between him and keeping this embarrassment from leaking out.

"HE HAS YOUR NAME KEITH!!!" Pidge finally gets out. A Galra attack could've happened and Keith and Lance still would've been frozen.

"W-where.."Keith finally manages to get his voice back about five minutes of being gobsmacked.

Lance's struggling renews with a new fevor, "PIDGE!!! DON'T YOU DARE YOU LITTLE RAT!""

An evil sadistic smile curls over Pidge's child-like face, "Dactylion, that's where..."

Keith's eyebrow's scrunch up again in confusion, "And where is a.. uh dact-y-lion located?"

"Hunk.." Pidge's face is synonymous to the cat that got the cream, "Would you do the honors?"

Hunk's smirk leers down at Lance and Lance wishes he had never taken that shower, none of this would be happening right now and he wouldn't be sweating bullets, "Hunk.. amigo, buddy, pal, bro, besty ...please don't do this to me..."

"The definition of Dactylion, " Hunk says loud and clear in a sing song voice as he bullies Lance's right balled up hand open, "Is the very tip of the middle finger..."

Lance's face is about as red as Keith's lion right now and tries his best to become a puddle of mush and sink into the ground, "d-DON'T GET THE WRONG IDEA!!! i WAS GOING TO SAY i WANTED TO USE THE CONDITIONER BUT I-i stOPPED AT 'TO' AN-and THEN I FLIPPED YOU OFF BEHIND YOUR BACK BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO FAR AWAY TO REALLY CONTINUE A FIGHT WITH!!!"

Lance hides his face in his freed right hand, still under a large boulder of a Hunk.

_Smooth Lance, Smooth as SAND PAPER!_

"I-I didn't use your conditioner" Keith stammers, Lance peeks an eye out between his fingers and is met with a furiously blushing Keith, "... it smells funny, umm, Quiznak I-I'm not saying this right...My nose has always been sensitive to smells and the conditioner doesn't smell like y-yo*gulp* umm... I d-did use your body wash be-because it's from home, an-and it, uh smells like you... and umm. GAAAAAAH!!! IT-YOU SMELL NICE OKAY!?!?"

A bright glimmering blue name in scrawling cursive stretches across Keith's nose, making the blush look a far deeper red than before.

Lance gulps, daring to look into his newly discovered soulmate's eyes. It's at this point Lance laughs turn hystericaly, Hunk get's off of Lance before he cracks the guy's ribs having felt his lungs heave under his weight, "We-WE're Soo. HAHAhahaHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! We're really dorks aren't we?"

Keith hauls his claimed soulmate off of the couch with a hand, quieting the crazed laughter with a soft and gentle kiss to Lance's lips. Pulling away they both grin and snicker, "Yeah, you could say that again..."

Lance sighs wistfully but a frown marrs his face, "but if you didn't use my conditioner, who's been leaching off of mine?"

Coran stumbles into the lounge and rummages under a counter, "Quiznak, I used the wrong hair soap again... now where was that special soap remover, I could've sworn I had put it under here somewhere."

The bright blue gravity-defying dandelion fluff looking hairdo was all the answer he needed as everyone in the room collapsed into a pile of cackles, Coran just seemed to believe they'd all lost their minds.


End file.
